The Rape Pandemic

Hello Folks, 

Today, we are going to understand a very sensitive issue: Rape/Sexual Assault. 

The world is echoing with pleas of Justice for one woman and then the other, and then the next; the count goes on. Innocent children are being molested and assaulted day in and day out. And Male Sexual assaults go unreported most of the time as a symbol of our failure to recognize the crime by gender neutrality. 

Let's start with statistics: One rape was reported every 16 minutes in India in 2019. This data is based on reports generated and does not include the women, men, and children who stood mum because of the fear that is churned within due to the judgemental society. 32033 rape cases were registered in 2019 in India and surprisingly, getting the victim count of males is next to impossible because male rapes are still considered as a taboo. 

What makes somebody rape another human being? 

Sexual assault is always traumatizing and demeaning for its victims. But the motives behind it vary. A study conducted by Dr. Samuel D. Smithyman, a US clinical psychologist revealed rapists have some common characteristics: a lack of empathy, narcissism, and feelings of hostility towards the victim(women/men/children). 

Most social scientists, psychologists, and feminist activists believe that rape exclusively has to do with issues of power and violence. They say that rape is not about lust but motivated by the urge to control and dominate, and that it could also be driven by hatred and hostility towards the victim. In the growing world, patriarchy and dominance are expressed through a kind of "dehumanization" in which the victim is seen as inferior to the perpetrator. This makes it much easier for the victim to become the target of aggression.

When asked, rapists have expressed gratification in taking advantage of the victim under the influence of alcohol or drugs. They receive motivation as they humiliate and degrade the victim. They also quote that on several occasions they were hurt, rejected, and wronged by the victim's gender identification, in the past.

Any reason stated above holds no excuse for a sexual assault as it is an act of violence and a criminal offense. Unfortunately, a lot of the victims remain silent to avoid stigmatization and being blamed by society, while their rapists are free to look for another victim.

Let's look at the myths and facts about Rape:

Myth: If someone gets really drunk, it’s their own fault if they end up getting raped. They should have kept themselves safe.

Fact: People have the right to drink alcohol without getting assaulted. Having sex with someone very drunk, drugged, or unconscious is rape – and it is always the rapist’s fault.

Myth: Women often lie about rape because they regret having sex with someone, or because they want attention.

Fact: Stories in the media can give the impression that women often lie about sexual violence. In fact, false allegations of rape are very rare. Most people who have been raped or experienced sexual violence or abuse never tell the police.

Myth: If someone didn’t scream or try to fight their attacker off, then it wasn’t rape.

Fact: There are many reasons why someone might not scream or struggle. In fact, many people find that they cannot move or speak at all – this is a very common reaction. Some rapists also use manipulation or threats to intimidate or control the other person. No matter whether or not someone 'fights back', if they didn’t freely consent to sex then it is rape.

Myth: If you are in a relationship with someone, it’s always OK to have sex with them.

Fact: Everyone has the right to say 'no' to any type of sexual activity at any time – including with their partner. Consent must be given and received freely every time. Rape and sexual violence in a relationship are illegal.

Myth: People who were sexually abused as children are likely to become abusers themselves.

Fact: The vast majority of people who were sexually abused as children never rape or sexually abuse other people. This is a dangerous myth that is sometimes used to excuse the behavior of people who do sexually abuse children or others. There is never any excuse for sexual violence against children or adults.

Myth: Women shouldn’t go out alone at night as they are likely to get raped.

Fact: Only one in 10 rapes are committed by 'strangers'. The rest are committed by someone the survivor knows – such as a friend, neighbor, colleague, partner, or family member. People are raped in their homes, their workplaces, and other settings where they previously felt safe. The risk of rape by a stranger shouldn’t be used as an excuse to restrict what women can do.

Myth: Women provoke men to rape them by wearing revealing clothes or flirting.

Fact: It doesn’t matter what a woman is wearing, or how she is behaving – if she doesn’t consent to sex, that is rape. Only the rapist is ever responsible for rape.

Myth: Once a man is sexually aroused he can't help himself; he has to have sex.

Fact: Men can control their urges to have sex just as women can. No-one needs to rape someone for sexual satisfaction. Rape is an act of violence and control. It can't be explained away and there are no excuses.

Myth: When it comes to sex, women and girls give out mixed signals. They sometimes 'play hard to get' and say 'no' when they really mean 'yes'. 

Fact: Everyone has the legal right to say 'no' to sex and to change their mind at any point of sexual contact. If the other person doesn't stop, they are committing sexual assault or rape. When it comes to sex, we must check in with our partners, respect their wishes, and believe what they tell us about what they do and don't want.

Myth: Men of certain races and backgrounds are more likely to commit sexual violence.

Fact: There is no typical rapist. People who commit sexual violence come from every economic, ethnic, racial, age, and social group. 

Myth: Men don't get raped.

Fact: Men are also raped and sexually assaulted. While Rape Crisis focuses particularly on women and girl survivors, we of course recognize that the impacts of sexual violence and abuse on men and boys are no less devastating. We believe all survivors of sexual violence and abuse deserve specialist support.

Myth: Women don’t commit sexual offenses.

Fact: The majority of sexual assaults and rapes are committed by men against women and children. However, women do perpetrate sexual violence against other women, men, and children. Often people who've been sexually assaulted or abused by a woman worry they won't be believed or their experiences won't be considered 'as bad'. This can make it difficult for these survivors to access services or justice.

Want to talk?

If you have been affected by rape or sexual violence, you can talk to me.

Many people who have been raped, sexually abused, or sexually assaulted feel confused about what has happened to them. If something sexual has been done to you without your consent, it’s not your fault and you’re not alone.

Connect with me through the social media links available down below. If you still feel uncomfortable, write an e-mail to me and I promise to stand by you. 

Let us get acquainted with the laws prevailing in India for sexual assault. 

Section 375 of the IPC made punishable the act of sex by a man with a woman if it was done against her will or without her consent. The definition of rape also included sex when her consent has been obtained by putting her or any person in whom she is interested, in fear of death or of hurt.

Also, sex with or without her consent, when she is under 18 years is considered rape. However, under the exception, sexual intercourse or sexual acts by a man with his wife, the wife not being under 15 years of age, is not rape.

Section 376 provided for ten years of jail term to life imprisonment to whoever commits the offense of rape(gender-neutral).

The punishment for gang rape was increased to 20 years to life imprisonment under the 2013 Act.

The Criminal Law (Amendment) Act, 2018 put the death penalty as a possible punishment for rape of a girl under 12 years; the minimum punishment is 20 years in jail.

False rape case accusations have been punished by courts in the past by a fine and also, jail time. 

Even after having a justice system that understands the devastation caused by Rape/Sexual Assault, we still see that the fear of committing the crime hasn't reached the masses. I believe anyone who is found guilty of Rape: regardless of their gender/age should be punished with life imprisonment or death. Nothing else would bring down the numbers of the victims. The trauma of the survivor cannot be explained in words, the misery can just be described as beyond endurance. 

I also strongly feel, there is a need to spread awareness of Male sexual Assaults as it isn't the gender, it is the trauma of surviving an assault that makes you the victim. 

False allegations do question the credibility of the crime but if you have suffered this heinous crime; coming forward and seeking justice for your suffering is the right thing to do. Society is a herd of sheep which favors the trend and is opinionated. It will speak, no matter how hard you try to curb its comments. We do function as #SeekJustice Society, but it is high time when we actually speak about it without hesitation. 

Note to the Reader (if you are a Survivor of the crime)

Stand with your head held high, it is your right to get avenged for the assault done to you. It isn't your fault, nothing can justify the crime and you did nothing to provoke the predator. You became a victim and your actions don't make you responsible for what was done to you. 

Don't hesitate to connect with me if you seek justice and also, you can dial the numbers below: 

Women In Distress: 1091

Children In Distress: 1098

Jeevan Aastha Helpline(Suicide Prevention): 1800 233 3330  

AASRA(Suicide Prevention):+91 98204 66726

Fortis Stress Helpline:+9183768 04102

Delhi Women Protection Cell: 011-24673366/ 4156/ 7699

Shakti Shalini ( N.G.O ) {Women Shelter, Support Survivors, Councelling}: 011-24373737, 011-24373736/10920

http://www.delhipolice.nic.in/home/backup/woman%20help%20line.pdf

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Sanna